Tuesday, May 10, 2011

On Having A Vagina

Having been so long since I made my account on OkCupid, I assumed that much of my information was dated.  I've changed over the years, and going through every single question and quiz, reading and changing answers, it sounded like a bore.  So I decided to delete my old account and start fresh.  Not only to have an accurate profile (I'm not even sure this matters anymore), but to compare myself now to who I was in 2007.  I kept most of the profile information the same, save for adding a few new interests and pictures.  I'm slowly re-answering questions and re-taking quizzes when I have absolutely nothing better to do.

Surprisingly, there was a huge difference in my matches from my old profile.  Change can be good, right?  I hope so.  But I barely had time to ponder that before the messages started pouring in.  All I had filled out was my age, location, and sex (female).  In the short period of time it took me to transfer images and profile information from my old account to the new one....well, it was a good hour and a half, I was multi-tasking, a surprising number of people either messaged me or added me as a favorite.  Based only on the information available, that I am 26 years old and female.  I guess some people have very few requirements for who they want to date.  Or fuck, as some of the messages implied.

The more I flushed my profile out though, the fewer random pleas for sex I received, and I started getting actual messages.  Some from people I'd never spoken to, some from people I already knew (my new account is obviously the same person as my old one, I made sure I wouldn't be mistaken for someone else).  And I decided to be brutally honest this time.  Especially with the match questions.  I haven't finished answering enough yet to make an entirely informed comparison, but the people that messaged me today seemed far less annoying than those I encountered with my match profile from 2007.  I was prepared to spew cynicism all over this blog, but I can't say I'm particularly disappointed.

I had a nice conversation about literature, a nice conversation about bicycles, and a nice conversation about extraterrestrials and their connection to spirituality.  Sprinkled among a few "John on a Budget" and "Bring a Gun" messages of course, but I just politely told those people I wasn't interested.  No beating around the bush, no being nice.  This is my new philosophy: fuck you.  And it's working great for me!  I wasn't the least bit pissed off after checking my messages today.

My old method was entertaining, sure:

But in the end it felt like a lot of wasted time and wit.  And honestly, the above image is by far one of the least offensive examples I can give of what's been said to me on OkCupid.  I'm in too good of a mood today to post threats and hostility.

Okay, that's a lie.  I have a bit of a beef with a certain someone at the moment.  I did catch him briefly on OkCupid today (the one place he's guaranteed to check nearly every hour).  But the potential for me to get over my blood curdling anger is now slightly higher than never.  So I'll keep my mouth shut about that for now.  No I won't, I'm terrible at that.
Believe it or not, that's a civil conversation.  I'm alright with this.  

The one thing that actually did upset me was that OkCupid decided one of my pictures was "unsuitable" and removed it.  The same picture I'd had on my old account for at least a year.  I suppose I'll just submit it again later and hope for more liberal report moderation.

1 comment:

  1. you're on a vastly different wavelength than most beings